5 Years ago I started a blog, ONE Year ago we were surprised with a son, 5 Months ago Dezirae was diagnosed with cancer, ONE Month ago we received tough diagnoses for our youngest son. We have 5 more rounds of chemo and ONE week left of our Pay-it-Forward Thirty-ONE party!!
Here is the link to our Pay-it-Forward Thirty-ONE party….all orders must be placed by Feb 26th!
5 More weeks of chemo……we are working on celebration plans for that!
ONE month ago Theodore was officially diagnosed with RAD(reactive attachment disorder) along with multiple other diagnoses. Most of these we have suspected for a long time.We chose to wait and give him time to adjust, learn the language etc before seeking official diagnoses.
He has continually worsened over the two years he has been with us. We have very little attachment. That paired with his constant need to control and manipulate make for an extremely stressful situation. We haven’t talked much about this because most people only see this ADORABLE little boy and a CRAZY mama!
After a while you start to believe that you are indeed crazy and you really don’t want to go anywhere with said child….. Every “adorable, handsome, so cute” comment further deepens his brokenness. Every time any of our concerns are met with “my kids do that” or “It’s not that big of a deal” etc. we are broken a little more and before long you feel completely alone!
It is impossible to imagine this unless you have lived it. We can’t “treat” him like our other children because his past and his needs are much different. We don’t need others to understand. We do need prayers and support and for everyone to educate yourselves about trauma and attachment issues!
Theodore is a gift from God…..we are striving to love him and help him heal. He IS adorable, but please don’t say this within his earshot! We also ask that if you should see him that you not pat his back, tussle his hair, hug, hold etc. THANK YOU!
5+ONE Months ago(I wrote this entire post thinking it was 5 months instead of 6!!) Today Dezirae was diagnosed with cancer. We were working on our house and the countertop guy was here….poor man! We have seen God work overtime through each of you! He is amazing! We give him all GLORY for Dezirae’s spirit in this!!
ONE year ago we offered to do respite care to help another family. Little did we know that a few short months later he would become our son! He is helpful, fun, caring and learning to love(even though it’s a very scary feeling for him).
5 years ago I began blogging to keep our family and friends updated about our adoption journey to Sarena! She just turned 18 and has been home 4 years! Sarena is patient, kind and has really grown emotionally the last 5 months!!
Keeping you all in our hearts and in our prayers. You and your family have had a journey that the LORD Holds in His very capable hands. Trust is hard, but when we KNOW HIM, we can keep falling on that trust, when we don’t even trust ourselves. We do not understand all you go through, but we do know the same Lord and Savior. We give you over to Him, over and over as we read your journey. Know we care deeply, and love you all! God bless and continue to be with you and help you through each moment! Happy to read of each Victory!
Have you met up with other families dealing with RAD? I have a friend in CA whose adopted daughter from China was diagnosed with RAD. It has been quite a journey for them. If you need someone to talk to who has walked the same path, let me know.
We have a great support system that includes friends with RAD children! We had our first RAD child 6 years ago….we just haven’t shared much on our blog about Theo ;(